“New Year, New Me”; It’s a Myth
I asked how people felt about the phrase, and they say:
“Why wait until next year? Why wait for a date that’s not necessarily promised?”
“…don’t be new, be better” one of my peers said, emphasizing their emphasis to try and be better everyday.
While on the other end some believe “It can be an empowering fresh start.”
Yes, we absolutely signify the coming of a new year as a fresh start. We essentially live our lives by years e.g. birthdays, anniversaries, school years etc. So, maybe that’s why when we are setting monumental goals around the end of the year, we set a start date of the beginning of the new year. I really do get it! But why are we waiting for that “fresh start” to commit to our self-improvement? Waiting delays the progress we could have made days or even weeks previous to the new year.
The reality is that habits, improvement, and change in oneself take time; it doesn’t happen overnight. A 2009 psychological study found that new habits take from 18 to 254 days. It’s a broad range. I’m no psychologist, but I’m willing to bet that the folks on the quicker end of the spectrum stayed consistent, intentional, and deliberate in creating that new habit.
A Fresh Perspective
January 2024 and learning we were having a baby essentially threw off the plans I had for myself for that entire year. Don’t get me wrong, we are SO tremendously blessed, but things are just slightly (by slightly I mean majorly) different in the Murphy-Swanson household. Everything I have planned for 2025 revolve around being a better Jazmine so that I am a better mother, wife, daughter, and friend. I realize that I need to be a better individual so that I am the best I can be in the roles I play for the people I love. I’m still growing from the milestones and blessings from 2024. There is no “New Year, New Me”.
I think we need to have a refreshed perspective on the whole thing, an honest outlook:
“New Year, Same Me-Just Better”
“Evolving in the New Year”
Or, specific to 2025 “Watch Me Thrive in 2025” (corny? yes, I know)
When January 1st comes around, we try to go hard. I’ve been there done that. “I’m going to the gym Monday-Friday. I’m gonna read every single night, and meal prep for the week every Sunday. And, unfortunately, that “cold turkey” method exhausts us because we are trying to do everything all at once without having done any research or testing things out to see what works best for us!
Action Plan
Instead of…
having this huge list of new things you’re going to do in the new year, make a short list of about 3-5 tasks, skills, or plans you are interested in. Do the research on everything on your list and determine the best way to implement them that benefits YOU best.
Instead of…
trying to start EVERYTHING all at once, try starting one thing at a time. Maybe a new task, skill, or plan every quarter? It gives you time to try it, research as much as necessary, implement your new findings, make improvement, and build routine. Then, at the start of the new quarter begin the next task. skill, or plan on your list. By then, you could typically have a decent routine established for task, skill, or plan number one while working to get the hang of task, skill, or plan number two.
If by the time 2nd quarter comes around and for any reason you don’t have that routine established, keep at it until you’re comfortable. You don’t have to move down your list until you’re ready. The sun is still going to rise, Lord willin’. Don’t be hard on yourself, these are personal goals. Life is going to life. Trust me, I know.
It’s only a few days into the new year, you can still modify and refresh your annual plan for yourself. Get out your notebook, planner, or journal. Sit in that quiet space that you know helps your mind to be free and write that short list.